Skip to main content

stoic front

for so long i've trained
for so long i've strained
my mind but finally the results are in
i'm better than i've ever been
no more bad emotions inside me
besides those i cant see
no i wont express them in my face
 and that just rests my case
of pain i've felt
all those words i've never said
will pour out through my pen
yea i know that there ain't much to gain
by doing this but
i'm doing this just
because i want to
just because i have to
it's my own resolve
that might just solve
many problems that i have
yes i'm mad
for even trying to put up a stoic front
when my mind's a war zone
no place to call home
for my mind, barely there, mostly gone
cause the more i put the stoic front
the more insane i'll become
but i have to do that for those i love
i have to be that peaceful dove
that everyone wants me to be
and by everyone i mean
the voices inside me...
(its been a long time since the voices inside me (criss and seul) began to nag me to put up the stoic font so that i can have more time to save me from my own emotions and to save me from ROY itself. so i finally decided that i'd take up on their suggestion.)
-yakaa: jujaa:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

memor....hallucination

that cute little butt of hers those beautifull brunette curls that flows across her face yeah the same one with button nose and her smile the one that goes all the way to her heart it was nothing but a lie oh why did i had to lie??? why did i had to break that promise i made her yeah i cried but tears stopped right before they reached my eyes i had a reason for ending it and she knew it every bit so well: even more than me that she could tell what i had to say hello miss cuddles! well you ain't there thats just my hallucination please don't stare at me i can't bare to see you go, where are you now??? nowhere but in my brain -yakaa: jujaa #felicity (i wrote this one some two years back. back then i was called eklo yatri. meanings the same it's just a matter of language. dedicated to felicity. she meant the world to me. n even though we have drifted apart i still hallucinate her voice)
3 comments
Read more

working hard

one side says up, another says down do i look like a fucking depressed clown to you when i have these episodes?? when two close sides inside fight within my so called brain trying to take control over my body while i look dazed like a fat glazed bun, yea i'm a nut case so what? i've read every article available on my MPD and i had that shit since before Power Rangers SPD began airing so yea it's been a long time but unlike wine it's only grown worse like an aged racing horse and while i try to guard my important ones from that side, working as hard as i can to keep these personalities  in check they leak out making me look fake but oh! my hard work is paying i can't stop but i keep delaying their appearances in my body till one day i explode till one day i cant contain them no more but till that day I'll work hard without having to say to keep my other sides beside.... -yakaa: jujaa: (i am working hard #promise..just not on the fiel...
4 comments
Read more

who?

the moon was bright but my sight got blurred  damn that cursed side of me i said but it said "it's just fate" wait! I've never heard that voice  before, it replied "I'm not your choice" i thought "so it's not Criss or Roy?" it replied "I'm new, you boy! but wait, where am I? all i see is a girl in sight who's holding your hand tight giving you a will to fight I'm new here dude" "so you don't know how to be rude? like Roy or be cool lie Criss?" it replied "i was born in a pool  of memories you fool so stop drooling. i'm born so just accept me and share what you choose to see with me and I'll heal you" (as i was looking at the moon, it talked to me...") -yakaa: jujaa:  
Post a Comment
Read more