extra dark coffee

well shit! I've fallen for her not in the past but now she makes my heart flutter well shit! this makes things awkward I'm like a dog that can't bark why did my vision change? the way i see... why man!!! because she is my freaking bestie Naw man! i can't be feeling this she is actually on my list... lemme think clearly for a moment... (ater six  months) oH! shit!!! i have to somehow bend my heart from not feeling this thing but do i think i can change it? Naw! I've always been a crazy shit si i guess I'll just let it roll and try not to make her my ultimate goal easier said than done mate now that i think abpout it... it musta been fate that made me meet this girl who seeks light in impossible if times this idiot who won't let me whine in peace, this annoying lil piece man i somehow have to stitch my mouth shut and stay quiet and tell myself massive lies so be it! it's a decision it's a mission roger that brain but zip

I'm not a good person I'm not suited to be anybody's home I'm just a stone a proof of something gone wrong in life; a ddeadbeat guy, an almost NEET guy, a guy who has everything going right yet has no will to fight a guy who sees the light but doesn't have the might to go towards it a guy who makes a shit of every decision a guy who has no precicion to do anything so I'm telling you, stop seeing me as a good human being but the fact remains that i can't be mean infact that's the only good thing in me so don't get attached to me, I'm screaming for i can't help you because i need help too but i need to do it alone just to atone for the lies and the dreams that i've crushed for the times I've rushed just to be a demon to myself so let me yelp and suffer alone and let me be one person gone from your life just please don't stop to fight and be others help but I'm just gonna remove myself from being

creating an in-fillable hole playing an unforgettable role you came to my life you made me strive for something greater than myself you became my only help and carried on the legacy the legacy that only i could see and that too when i had just sent a suicide letter to myself just when i had begun ti yelp a every small wound you came as a boon and just like everybody before you you did what they doo poof!!! gone and i was left all alone maybe i was at fault too for doing the mistakes that i do but I'm just a human I'm not a god sent creature, I'm not a perfect one but i was far too gone for you to oversee my mistakes so i thank you for holding that long for my sake and I'm sorry that i lost you believe me i really do  and all that remains is your memory theone I'll cherish till the day i die... #promise (TBH when i wrote this poem i had no idea that it'd be relatable to that baka but as i typed this thing it reminded me more and m

how long has it been since i had last seen those three words on screen it now seems like a dream to me and see those words is it a curse just to get hurt so i just blurt those words but even the voices in my head dissolves those words that'll make me blush i don't wanna die i don't wanna be high plese s say it once even though it's a lie and make me feel alive even if it's for a split second hell! I'm even ready to fund you as broke aas i may be why can't anyone see the desperate soul in me bur screw it, let it be i can live without hearing them and die too.... (not my story but this is one for those peeps who haven't heard the words "i love you" in a long time.... well there is someone secretly crushing overy you my mate. just learned this thing recently. don't give up hope peeps... you will find the love of your life in unexpected ways. no that i have found the love of my life but hey.. there is my favorite quote