extra dark coffee

"what is the strongest hate" i heard as someone said and it made me remember her face... she was an angel someone who seemed like fall ever so changing and mature with whom I'd feel secure but she also had a tornado inside her a silent yet deafening murmur and me? i was a rain always drained and i was desert always ready to blurt total nonsesne and deep shits always clenching my fists and she...attracted me and i could somehow feel a string sense of love for that fall and yet i got mauled by her without herintention and not to mention the times i got hurt when i hopelessly tried to flirt she was the meaning of control and freedom and i was a nomad whose life was to roam and so i began to search for a chance to express my feelings but she already knew them yet she had a mean-ing streak and ignored them, became close and once i knew it i shut the door and went back to the drawing board and all that love stored turned dark and left a mark......

Impossible! i said but i had to let my heart take a look at her and suddenly my sense went dull i jolted back to the present and i thought it was never meant to happen; was just a dream i cleched my jaw; stopped the scream that place-that moment that glow-that faint scent of hers that'll remain in my heart, forever it will stain i could've said please don't leave but even after years i can't still believe that she was gone; gone into dust and in my heart the metalic rust has covered it to the brim well after all it was just a dream and i guess i realize it now i have to accept that fact somehow the fact that she has already died a while back but her departure has left a huge crack a cracdk that shoots right across as a slap reminding me "we always want what we cannot have" #seraphin (this is an encient # of  a person who is usually mentioned here so.... meh! figure it out) -Yakaa: Jujaan